Lord Help me

Just...been...
more than 1 year is it ...
Since I've got notification on my phone someone I know followed me...
I reluctantly open this...and.... I kinda read all this blog's posts all over again
I'm...dissapointed in myself...seriously dissapointed ...

But..oh well let them past since I've got no control over my old mind

It's been long long past Anicult 2015 and ..
way too late is it..?

Finally got sensei autograph 

I could sleep peacefully now DX

AFAID also ruined me . I finally met Yami in AFAID DX

What  a  bliss ~

The only provocative poster that I wouldn't and couldn't stick it on my wall

This provocative poster , 2 posters below, 2 keychains , and uchiwa are from 1 package bought in front of the events which cost.... i dunno around IDR 200-300 may...be...忘れたんだ

Fun for me and no to my wallet

Lately I've been into Kdrama Descendant of the sun , Bring it on Ghost , Doctors , Love in the moonlight ,  W , and well others

And the one which make so much impact on me ... Scarlet Heart

It was just frustrating much the last episode aka the ending...

just...WHY

IU really pretty here so i took screenshots

Have I post this photo of her before ? because she's all grown up now . 1 Year 8 Months old . Time flies ~~~ so fast . Should I say time is enemy here ?

I'm also already on my 3rd Semester . And recently I just broke up . After 1 year relationship seems like it won't do . Well... I'm the one at fault afterall . There's just things that couldn't be said honestly .
プライドが高すぎとか、エゴとか、自己満足とか you named it . my relationship was like I'm the one in charge . Like I'm the one who are in fully control that was what  I thought and I dunno what's his thought maybe and ofc different from what I thought . At first , hmm how do I say ... Our relationship is like on the thin line . And I made the last straw . This semester somehow doing a really good job making me pissed and rage on all day along even until now . Coincidentally and unfortunately , I'm raging my anger on him . Thus BOOM , the end of us . To sum it up , we broke up by not a nice way and making it awkward if someday we do meet each other .
It's kind of.. i dunno i don't feel anything . But even if I want to make it up to him its already too late .
Too late to regret , too late to feel sad , too late to cry , too late to think , FOR ME .
I remember I bought him a present months ago and up till now still in my closet .
After this break up , this present and the letter which remained unsent feels like a waste .
Before the break up though , I told my friends how our relationship going . Tbh , i didn't tell my friend 100% the truth since we can't just trust someone as our ally just because we do share a couple years together no ? I told them my stories mixed with the manga i recently read to make it look like I'm the bad one . hurrr~ I'm the fvkn bad and a biatch one . And KABOOM they do believed *sigh*
Rumors do spread fast like a fire .
Well ~ Heartbreak is such a waste . A waste of .. well you named it . Waste of time ? waste of emotion ? waste of energy ? waste of feelings ? it's kind of ironic . What already happened then let it be huh ~ And here I am rambling afterall I said . まぁぁ～しょうがないなぁ～


Then , This year , my dose of anime kind of decreasing . Yuri on Ice make me think like ..... is this anime yaoi or not because Victor keep hinting it and I  just couldn't pinpoint it out . Yet on Ep 7 they do Chuu ~ so I was like ohhh okay now I got it they do .

All this blog's post will become reminder of what adolescent me wrote .

Trash is back

Yo ! This trash is back again 

I feel like I'm good at leaving things unsettled . I didn't realize this  blog ain't updated more than 1 year . I keep reminding myself after the last post " Next week I'll update for sure ! " . Yet in the end I didn't do it until today . I remember to update this now because I just read my friend blog which last update around first month this year ?  And everytime I comeback here , I always change the music playlist or background ( spent most time here )

I call this year The year of loss . Un totally year of loss . Dunno how did I find this idea . Just lately lots of people keep dying one by one . Is this some horror movie ?

Comedian , actor and others passed away . Next thing I know , my dog passed away after going away from home because of the heat season ( it's a boy ) . Next , my teacher's mother passed away . Next , my dad's friend , his mother , passed away . Next, my mom's friend , her sister , was hospitalized . Now , both my dad and mom 's acquiantance is in hospital . um..this..is too much grief . I better stop now .

My last exams is done long ago which means finished already . I should be free and enjoying holiday now . Last month , yes . Now, I don't think so . Back then , I need some additional cash so I could spent for what i think important but people think ridiculous . That's it . I earned abit by helping my aunt's shop yet I spent it on food not the stuff i mention before . Ugh I should have some thought before I spent it .

I'm planning to go to Anicult 2015 in Surabaya ,while I'm from Jakarta so I thought " Ah I should save up some money . No one could ever expect there's going to be lots of nice stuff there ! " . And this happend . I'm doomed . This is my first time going to Anime Events outside of Jakarta so I'm excited and kind of scared . My friend ask me why should I'm going to when I could just not going . My answer is NO since I bought the Nekota-sensei fanmeet ticket without second thought . Damnit once in a lifetime .

Thus I'm searching for company or maybe friends to meet there and maybe I hope walking together or maybe stay and stick together in Surabaya . *this kind of thought crossed this unsocialized hikikomori girl*

That's why anyone who got invited or asked by strangers about Anicult and Hotel and travel , THAT'S ME .

Back again to now i'm not free and enjoying holiday . Around 2 weeks ago, this girl came as a new family member 

Her name is Emerald .Since she came to the household , everything is in disaster . Trashbin , tissue , desk , chair , my feet, my hand , people's hand and feet , my shoes , toilet stuff , toilet brush were all chewed out . What shocked me the most was when I left my Chocolate Caramel candy and the next thing I found is ... only wrapper left .

I kind of like WTF dog shudn't eat stuff like chocolate right its poison for them . thrice I caught her vomitted and ahh she vomit it I'm a bit relief . Then she tried to eat it again lmao . Must keep it far from within her reach .

Second , she can't stay put . I know this type of dog prefer cold place . She calm herself and sleep in the toilet . I'm facepalming at this first . At night , she won't stay put and keep howling if I didn't let her come in my room . Yeah I know every dog like this . My last dog did howling too ,but when I took him to my room , he calmed down and sleep . This one ? No . She trashed around my room .  Climb on my bookshelf and step on my comics .

Last , her poop smells more than my poop . Seriously smells . Everytime she pooped , she always walk around so she pooped once but there are 2 of it . Twice the smells . God bless me

Last year . I bought this mask since it's on sale . Ain't gonna miss this . I forgot to take photo of everything besides my face . And well my face is in ちょいちょい condition .

Everytime I put on the mask ( twice a week ) The tingling sensation never left . But It's good for tightening pores . 

Repurchase ? Nah

Rate ? ★★★

Lately , I'm back playing Rage of Bahamut again . Things changed and I lost opportunity of great card . Yes GJ .

And I start playing School Idol Festival aka Love Live . First I played the English and leveled up till 40 . Then kind of curious with the Japan SIF . Installed it and played it . Now , The Japan SIF level is far more higher than the English . I keep playing the Japan SIF since the song are more updated and yeah doesn't keep me bored . All in all still keep playing both , much everyday especially during event . Aim for the SR Event Card .

I don't remember what should I post anymore 

P.S  ANYONE WHO READ THIS AND PLANNING TO GO TO ANICULT 2015 TOO , LET'S GO GATHERING AND KEEP ME COMPANY LOL LET'S GO TOGETHER ! I MEAN IT .

Pardon my broken english

Deleting ... Delete

I am deleting the late post :)

Today , my friend just told me their problems . And when I think more about it , their problems are far more troublesome than mine . I feel like my problems not as complicated as theirs so I think I should refrain from complaining and whining too much .

それで、

VALSHE 2ND Album are as amazing as always !! *fangirl screams*

And the 真実PV , even its only showing a bit it feels " whoaaa how come her voice could be like that and her face like that ! Its so cool ! " . That was what I thought . And I keep replaying Overture again and again XD


At first I was thinking to write this one as beauty review . I just came across Thailand products which took my interests . Some people maybe already know what is it since this products seems booming now .

When I searched reviews on the internet , I am a bit reluctant . Why ? Since they make the review with a blog like it feels as if the review and the blog are dedicated to the products itself . And I think to try it myself and then post it here in the next post after 2 weeks maybe ? count from 02/25 .






P.S-Is it only me or Do I feel like I don't have much emotions and emoticons in this post?


Moral of the day : I don't want to be the one at fault . That's why I keep trying to be good . But , in the end doesn't it feels like I am just being a goody-two-shoes ?

LAST EXAMS ARE LIKE THE DAY U SEE THE LIGHT !

I got to post this while struggling with physics . Since tomorrow is the last day of doom , might as well enjoy this day till drop dead .

----------------------------

continue typing this after 6 hours study for math . Holycrap math was like hell for someone who doesn't understand calculation things like me . Sin Cos Tan were always confusing . In the end I only study a bit and then read . Then mostly telling about ghost story . I am indeed scared with this things but there's always this phrase in my head  , '' Curiousity kills a cat '' . Even when I am scared , my curiousity level still high *idiot's mind* . So I keep on listening until 1 of friend played a sound he download from playstore . Like u know lah the way some momo laughing hihihihihi and xixixixixixi . Hell , i jumped . I glared them and screamed to stop it . The more i'm upset , the more they do it . So , they played it for 2-3 minutes to the point i am adjusted to the sound . Just then, they clap .
Friend : '' yeay now u are not scared with this thing anymore *clap clap clap* "
Me : '' Hell yeah! *macho-man pose with no awesome biceps* "

Then they played another sound . Now the crying girl sound . Crap! No ! Really ! No ! no matter how much i listened this one . One can never get away without creeps .

Me : " ei u really had nothings to do to the point u download those kind of sounds . really mah ? "
Friends : " IT'S FUN *LMFAO* "

They download lots of creepy sounds , like one guy laughing which sounds like Sandy Claws . Seriously nothing to do since can't get the math at all . If I were to point what this 3 friends of mine like , they would be the type who loves to die sooner but no one want to take them yet .


Honestly , I don't know what i should i post next . I did write on the previous previous post i will post more detailed review but my major weakness , LAZINESS METER . Must resist the laziness in self .

2 weeks waiting and my packet comeeeeee ~ oleeeeee

Ah , Valshe-sama realized her album last month . Extremely regret since her album ... her album ... there's her real picture ...... *fangirl screams* and really envy with people in Japan , they sold limited poster of Baru-sama there *muuuuuuuuuuuhhhhh*

I tried !!! Really tried my best !!

Yosh ! I could blabbering my stress right now . Thanks to English assignment which make me must turn on lappy .

I remember back then i used Butterfly Foot Mask which i hadn't take picture of it
But I did took picture of the process *someone might find this yucky*

i used my school socks to prevent the liquid leaked out *bleh*

 

And wait for around 1 hour or more . Must admit this thing smells . It ain't really good for my nose DX

immediate tight-feeling-foot after done using

i think this is around 2-3 days after using

 

 1 weeks later~

 

 

And then i wait around 10 days and nothings changed .

 

around 1 months ahead ~

and then thiss HAHAHAHHAAHAHA

 

 

 

 

must admit my friends were like , " weii what happened to your foot ? is it cluster ? or your foot becoming like mine cracking like hell ? "

 

i repeatly told them this is the effect of the foot mask i used recently . Around 2 months , the skin completely peel-off .  True my foot feels soft but ain't soft as baby-butt XD

 

 

I just noticed this recently after gone home from my Trip which is the post before this one . I got unknown bruise lehh T_T

i got this one after the first one healed . Prone to bruise '_'

Noticed it on first photo . Must avoid tables and blunt objects DX

 

 

 

 

 

P.S    i realized when i edit this blog . Everything i post do ain't matching the song i put XD

 



Really Busy , Extremely Busy , Seriously Busy , Busy to the MAX .

Let's go to the point .  I am back from my trip to Penang about 2 months ago (笑）and just start update today hahahaha last week i made this blog purposely contain 18+ actually it can be yes and no depend on anyone who open and read this blog of mine , realize it or not .

I did it because my teacher assignment was to make a blog . I was like '' meh i have this one aredi . no need to make new one '' . And then he told me , we (class) will open it and see it together ( echoes ) . I made this blog only just for fun and sharing what i experienced and yeah other weird,strange,and unnecessary things around me . And to tell the truth in this blog i am almost never lying ( ofc there is once  a post which maybe will embarassed me if anyone in my class know it )

Ah btw trip to Penang was nice *thumbs up* . Lots of Crows , idk why but looking crows there were really fun and they are all pwettyyyyyy *~* . Also there's this Vendor ? or maybe store u named it lah . Around Penang streets which sold lots of chocolate types . I think the names was .. what was it ... Cocoa Boutique (?)
Chocolates there are really delicioso ~ .  When I went to Singapore , I am too lazy to move so for 2 days i am only on the room (bed) 1.Sleep   2.Eat   3.Watch Anime  4. Eat Chocolate  5.Sleep
There! I didn't go to the toilet for 2 days at all lol never imagined i could do this . I could say for 2 days i only eat chocolates bought in Penang cause am a fatass .
Ah there's benefit from this though . I watched my-super-late-list-anime-i-couldn't-watch-back-then

this room is really nice *ふわふわ*

SANKYUU MALAYSIA SANKYUU SINGAPORE !! WIFI THERE REALLY FAST COMPARED HERE . or maybe is it only my imagination .

Lastly , once twice thrice i lost in Penang . On the street . And i feel like " ohmygosh i am lost ! So excited feels like in movies !!! " and when i look up above there's lots of doves . What  comes to my mind first was " i should go back there's no excited if i get birdies poopies on my shirt and head " . Why did this kind of thing invade my mind eh ? There's once time in school , when my class were pointed to exercise vocal on field .
I was talking with my besties when one of my friend was acting like a robot . and then she told (asked) me

       " eyy , can u help me ? i think i got bird poop on my shirt and its getting on my hair too "

try imagined it . I look behind and laughing hard ( my besties also ) . i know its yucks .

This experienced become my lesson . Never stand under birds which were flying . They might land some almighty bomb .





Lately , around this time of year I would become sleepy-head and weakling . Nice cloudy weather with no thunder or storms i mean . Those rhyming sounds resembling lullaby . And around this of year also EXAMS ASSIGNMENTS ALL AROUND *hellyeah*
i am the type who difficults to find the time to update , once i had it I will update it long enough to the point people won't bother to read it .
My problems now are too many couldn't point out . Yet there's one dominant . MATH . Didn't understand anything AT ALL . People might think ohh maybe its because u too lazy to hear the teacher explanation or why not ask the teacher to explain it again . NO BRO ! 違うよ!

Try asking the teacher to explain = Ride for tea cups without doing anything JUST SIT for 6hours

won't wouldn't couldn't and can never understand it . I should find private teacher now *waste money better for food clothes and stuff* bahahahaha eiyah ! people have their own opinion . I know maybe i look stupid ( not that anyone had ever seen my face here ) しかし、自分の世界あるです！



Like maybe a bit weird stuff ... dunno it is effective or no cause im not really lookin through it

                                                              yo fatty legs thanks lor

And had aredi used up all Nature Republic Aloe Vera . Good for skin :D


Hopefully next time i could update faster since there's lots of things in my mind lately . And its making me goin on stress

BACK BACK BACK

TADAIMAAAAAA ~ OKAERIII ~
oh oh if i post this actually no one care . So sorry for come back . *bows*